JK,
Sorry for letting this thread lay still

I have a few more comments that may be answers.
Hopefully some of our friends will disagree and have better answers.
As I understand you have two problems:
1] moving SE onto the second (extended) screen let the system hang
2] if all the windows / dialogs of SE is not moved back onto the laptop screen before you shutdown your PC, these dialogs will not be visible to you if you only use your laptop screen.
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Possible answers [1]:
Most probebly your resources on the laptop can not handle the intensive graphics needed to run the 2nd extended screen. Try the following..
a] the screen memory is probebly shared with your main memory. Set it to a higher number on your BIOS. (ask a friend how to)
b] Change the amount of colours used for the 2nd screen to a lower number.
Change it from 32bit to 16bit. (right click on desktop -> properties -> settings, select the 2nd screen, change to 16k). You can also try to set it at a lower resolution maybe 1024 x ??.
c] >>temporary<< move your SE shortcut to the 2nd screen. Open the shortcut.
d] buy yourself a wide screen (BONUS: wireless mouse & keyboard) and connect it to you laptop.
Then use only 1 screen. A 19" wide profile LCD will do nicely (retail at less than Euro300??). I use it at home and will never look back.
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Possible answers [2]:
This problem is inherent to Windows. As far as I know from the programming languages I use regularly; you HAVE to move everything back to the laptop screen when you have finished using the extended desktop. Maybe someone else knows a way around it - there are Window codes that you can put into your shortcut to force it to run in a particular manner (screen).
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That is all I can contribute to this matter..
Your CAD friend,
WB